Nothing can be made in isolation. The libretto must be written in combination with the music, or rather, it all must be composed simultaneously and in relation, if the content is to be a focus upon relation. How to perform simultaneity? How to labor on multiple fronts at once? What's the best use of time? How is time to be used? A solution by way of a schedule: a single day broken up (fractured) into differing (dithering) degrees of focus. A rigid structure to contain a chaotic form. The libretto is condensed, should be concise, and only the most essential information should be maintained. I don't want it to be explicitly autobiographical - only implicitly perhaps - but to use myself somewhat arbitrarily as a point of convergence of relations to others. Reading is as important as the process of writing, and so I shall incorporate and appropriate the text of others to the extent that I can see something of myself in them, in style or reference or allusion or allegory - an emotional satisfying appropriation to compose through reading. I am alleviated from being creative and put into the role of explorer, curator, researcher, media archeologist, anthropologist of my own humanity through the humans I've inherited culture from.

The Ö album transports me back to a place, whereas the PROLOGUE is not rooted to Iceland.

The text may be written forever without implying a structure - a necessary frame to allow production to be possible. The text must maintain focus upon the line: lines of the text, line of time - present between past and future, the lines of structure imposed upon the meditations. The text content is of agency, but the composing structure is concerned with relinquishing that agency: to erect a structure to allow the text (and the music and the whole opera) write itself > related to the old collage practice = observing a metaphenomenon with its own emergent intelligence, concerned with autopoiesis and meta-discourse. I am in the role of an observer to these system which are not mine by way of ownership but by being implied within them. The multi-mind model in physics: the observer is always implicated within the system they are observing. My work is contentless to the extent of its preoccupation with its own parameters, which also liberates anything to become content: a series of observational scenarios to put "things" in relation, ambivalently discerning between them. I'm ambivalent (to an extent) about the things themselves. There's no end to the potential source material = the necessity of a frame/structure.

The internet is a pre-made all-human archive of content > draw from it actively and attentively, towards a nonlinear discursive narration of all things. The "internet of all Things" put in relation to the infinite cut-up libretto text: both reflect the archive-ability of the other infinitely radiating out in both directions, the compositional structure determined by clouds of meta-commands, keywords, tag lines, hash tags, search phrases, like linguistic algorithms for ontological spatio-temporal coordination, existential GPS, or even writing the libretto in a kindof computer language invented for evoking such computational outcomes. The website as meta-discourse: conceived as a series of frames/containers which I can continuously upload into - text, images, video, all as it is captured in real time wherever I am as transparently as possible, to allow life to take precedence within the proscenium of experience over the documenting methods: to make a life based on reading, observing, collecting and archiving experience.

I'm focusing too much on the abstract infrastructural framework which is leading me nowhere, pure motion without destination, infinite discursive thinking about thinking confined to the limitations of my own POV. These thoughts must be re-oriented towards design labor, to erect the structure visually and virtually, in order to allow my inquiries to read and absorb more complex concept while providing a fundament to pile up and sort upon. Once the categorical system is erected, the rest will fall into place naturally as life will consist of reading and writing, collecting and processing information, watching and storing video footage, imagining and auto-composing musical ideas, at a velocity on scale with the speed of life. The orchestration is concerned with the attention proliferating in the various scenario-frames of life itself. The first act of the opera is articulating this structure, building the room so that I can live within it, the articulation of the organizational structure that will liberate the living of life over art. The containers represent the current logical models for describing reality, relation, being and becoming within the real.

Video is in the movement category. The first screen/scene of the first act must be blackness, nothingness, from which all else will emerge. The splitting of a single voice into multiple voices, me addressing the facets of my own me. The text will be represented with subtitles: the text comes first, accompanied by silence. Other section may be only music - perhaps it's displayed as multi-channel video installation where all these elements can be mixed and dispersed throughout a space independent of a frontal-orientation pressure upon the media = a dispersion of the audience for a modulation of attention. SO can read lines of the libretto, perhaps lines written especially for her, or for a woman, or as my own voice. Other voices may be collected to begin recording aspects of the various characters, just to begin putting them into relation with each other - this method can take place over the internet, remotely, randomly, with whomever may be willing.

All the images will emerge - cannot be predicted - as they flow from a process of watching, not directing. The music will emerge from listening: perhaps direct musical appropriation, capturing or recording in the room at various levels of degradation, distorting or filtering digitally or organically to add layers of affect. While listening to the Ö album: the process of writing began organically, out of nothing, out of chance and spontaneity, then turning them over and over through a long period of time the rough stone was polished into a more concrete form. It just needs to begin, to generate something, to initiate a beginning by sheer determinism, then the secondary at more important process can be initiated of cutting, mixing, layer, and composing can run its course. There's an outline for a methodology for emerging out of a sedentary state of nothingness and begin composing something, rather than entertaining pure fantasy.

I just returned from a camping trip with my mother and we had some intense discussions about our relationship to each other, our individual relationship (mostly my own) to my father, and my realization of a profound dissatisfaction with that relationship and many percolating sensations in not believing I can do anything about it. A description of my origins, my inability to change them - my own mythopoiesis - but also my distaste for wading through the nostalgic murk of the past when my father often wishes to venture there, not wanting to be defined by that narrative, not believing in that self I once was while being able to maintain the sense of the person I have become, or am actively becoming, so opposed to that flickering other. He (father) maintains a determined focus upon the mainstream news sources, a voice omni-present yet not his own, so that he is serving as a syphon to amplify these externally programmed voices which I am trying to actively avoid - not him, but the popular news media. He believes it's his responsibility "to stay informed about what's going on" while I feel that it's important and of my (and our) responsibility to be critical in this media, to actively disengage from it, and to seek out other forms of articulation of world events, of life and what it can be, and more so to enact the praxis of our philosophies, even while recognizing the inherent struggle of doing so in relation to the overwhelming reign of stupidity foaming up all around us. My own frustration stems from having to confront these popular idiocies which I would otherwise avoid - a tension with having to confront them directly without the relief of arousing the meta-concerns of the media transmitting the corrupted messages: an extreme challenge to my patience and upon the relationship with my father relaying these signals. My mother is active in her engagements with me, trying to understand where I come from by accepting the difference and emphasize the importance of a close relationship. We still experience friction of course, through this difference, yet it productively dissipates through conversation and leads towards an undeniable proliferation of understanding in relation to each other. I want to differentiate my father from the subject matter he communicates, which seems easy enough for me but seemingly impossible for him, which brings about the question: can we be separated from the ideological memes we transmit through our conversations, relationships, private or public interactions? Are we to be judged by what we say, what we do, how we think? Where can an authentic self be located beyond our choice of what to watch on TV? I feel/sense/observe "the wall" (as described by my mother) growing within my father - a general defensiveness, obstinance, impatience, anxiety, suspicion, and fear, with extremely negative consequences to his person and those in his environment. Can it be decided that this is who he is as a person, whether this attributes are expressed willingly, with determinism, or sublimated unconsciously, merely expressed through an otherwise innocent well-meaning "good person?"

This autobiographical content could populate the void of the first scene, presented as a conversation with my mother about my father, or vice versa, or myself in relation to another facets of my own being concerning the nature of my parents as an origin, etc. Where can the singular nature of the self be located when observing those from which one came? Other content: NM, the family house, summer roadtrips, ___ (or other GF's) and their family, their articulation of origins, their traditions and parents, cultural inheritance, etc. Recorded conversations can be collected and transcribed to generate authentic content - this is possible but is it desirable? A natural language of normal people? Maybe later, in the second act, other voice will need to be generate from captured content, but for now confine the focus to merely my own voice because there's more than enough there. Who cares about this hyper personal content anyways, perhaps it lacks all relevance to others..?

Remember: the places visited during the camping trips as inspiration for stage craft, various landscape voids and the "headspaces" they proliferate: the skies of NM, Chaco canyon and the ancient civilization of the pueblo indians, the cliffs as primordial schism rising up out of the undifferentiated mass of a dry earth carrying all of its history on its pockmarked face, the geological scale of time before time, the poetics of dust and colored dirt. Should these accounts be written at the place? As a token of that location, a form of collection of experience made material? In these instances the self would serve as a container, a cypher for funneling impressions down into a mythopoietic text, the telling of a story, the narration of a geo-history, the oration of the voice of others and objects and things as beings or entities or gods or shimmering facets of the eye-I observing and imagining them. To step outside into that early morning light, to feel the space (remember Iceland), with steaming coffee and churning bowels, to account for the sensation of that specific location. I need to wake up and not stay confined in my room, but sneak outside and pay homage to the mountain (br)other as keeper of my context. The strength of the music also: all of my solo albums are bound to travels across country, to the effects of specific patches of earth upon territories of the psyche, California to Chicago, Sweden to Iceland, redwoods to desert desolation. Even CTASSAULTS is bound to the atmosphere of LA and Joshua Tree, mixed and mastered in the cold dark Swedish winter. The music = a medium amplifying emotional resonance, a machine for physical materializing the waveform logic of the body = and then a reversal, creating a cymatic machine to project influence of (idealized/ideated) affect back upon the body. Music as a mechanism of translation of memory of relations, of the body to a place, the affect of a specific time-space captured within a sonic ocean, to be poured back in and be waded into upon call, inspired by a geological-scale vibration to be processed through vibratory instrumentation and transmitted back to the resonant body receiver. The libretto is written through the fingers upon the mind in relation to a poetic description of place, moving towards the ineffable affect of language - a musical text, to be differentiated from the alienating philosophical turn of the more analytical voices. Multi-mind model: I want to produce and observe, or produce in order to re-observe that which might be forgotten. The video serves to interpret/translate yet again the emergent critical effect of these affect-laden processes, to make them comprehensible to the analytic mind, to process them through reasonable linguistic association as visual container of the ineffable poetic qualities, emphasizing the velocity/fidelity/complexity of the concepts through image montage, layering, and rhythmic texturing of visual experience.

And that's the end of my walk... I have my work cut out for me.